Double-header on Tuesday

What a fabulous day. I got to cycle in the morning, train in the evening, had a meeting with someone today that I've been trying to meet for a year.

The cycling class was fascinating in that it was a study in breathing. Running at a reasonable cardio rate for a sustained period of time seemed to unlock a store of energy that lasted through most of the day (until normal daily trough around six-ish). Just goes to show that you don't have to pound out the workout.

The Tuesday evening training session also increases my energy level on Tuesday night. I'll be feeling good for another few hours, then hopefully sleep peacefully and through the night.

Why am I Tired at the End of the Day?

It's Monday night and I'm feeling tapped. Is it because I need to physically rest after 5 1/2 hours of Yoga and two hours of floor work over the weekend? Is it because I've been up for about 16 hours and active for most of them? Is it because I wear down a little at some of the requests I field and the energy spent on things that may not effect the outcome? Maybe it's a little of all these things.

I did find myself getting slightly annoyed at the persistence of one individual who kept badgering at one point. While I didn't provide full effort on this item, I tried to not ignore it and handled with the minimum amount of effort. I did this by rewiring the problem back to the folks who should have exchanged the information and gotten the data correct in the first place. Even thinking about it now is mildly aggravating. (So, enough on this -- can't work it now -- will work it when it comes back up -- hopefully, never again.)

There was a work event where I got coached (if not flagged) on my perspective of some executive assistance. I admitted to the language, and suggested my words reflected the way the situation had been portrayed to me -- with one name mentioned. When I mentioned the name, the "do it to us" concept was probably understood. Anyway, no further coaching after the name-dropping.

I was very happy to see the GM, who was in good spirits and found the way to playfully engage. I probably gushed positive, but it was done sincerely. I acted like I felt and I did so naturally. I was truly happy to see the person and glad to share the positive outlook for good things to come. My position should be valuable and backed up by the results. We'll see as we move into the year and the newly minted try their wings under severe resource constraints. Watch out for the sun, Icarus.

I think I can do a chapter a day in French and finish the book and review this month (it's the 16th and I finished chapter 14 today) and next month before French 2 begins.

I'm looking forward to the surprise this weekend, but not the driving. I want to go to the Yoga theatre Friday, but really would like to find someone else interested in this to go with and discuss. I'm REALLY looking forward to private Yoga on Saturday.

Friends

Lots of fun having dinner and partying with friends tonight. I felt bad wanting to leave early, but I was tired and it is a work night for me. Looking forward to upcoming events.

Yoga with a twist (twisted Yoga)

There's nothing quite as enjoyable as a two-hour Yoga class where there's plenty of time to do lots, and to focus on doing these things well. Sabine is a fabulous teacher and light-hearted enough to make it really fun. She's got just the right edge to cut through the more challenging parts of Yoga and enables a full room of people to enjoy.

Yoga and Rest

Saturday was good for Yoga as I got to do two sessions, totatlling about 2.5 hours of Yoga. The morning flow session was deep as well as intense. The afternoon sessions was quiet but somewhat intense. I felt new sensations along the side after doing turned side-angle and triangle poses.

I felt physically calm after the Yoga, and was pretty much in a restful state. Went out to look at some property, shop for iPod cover (too many choices), light dinner and movie.

Early evening with piano and rest.

Friday with Friends

It was pleasant to spend the evening with friends, and share notes on how our kids have grown, accepted responsiblity, and accomplished in different areas.

I recognized that I like to be represented in a way that is faithful to my belief and had to work to correct one story. I should just let this go, but since it was a little troubling I felt the need for closure.

Looking forward to some rest this weekend as a lot of effort was applied during the week, mostly at work. Sunday morning Yoga is almost certain, and I'm not sure what I'll do for exercise on Saturday.

It's late now, and a good time to unwind.

I Get Paid to be Patient!

Another fun and challenging day at the office (dear). I found myself running mostly back to back as I'm doing a lot of personnel work. I found one particularly challenging situation with a person who is running a little on the negative side. While I appreciate the sentiment and the motivation for it, there is a limit to how much venting is productive and in what forum is it appropriate. Certainly a group sigh is okay, but that must be followed by a deep breath in.

I did get some strong positive, though, from another member who described the opportunity as so abundant that it was difficult to know where to start the harvest. My goal is to always keep the soil ready for planting, while I must also remember when to sew my own seeds.

Yoga class tonight was very good. I was startled during savasana by a painful cry from a classmate. The sound of human despair abruptly occuring during deep relaxation was way out of the ordinary. I waited until the end of class, which was only a few minutes after the interruption and went over to offer comfort. I really didn't know if going over during class was okay, and the instructor went over as well after class rather than during the close. What was even more startling was that the person is normally very focused, upbeat, positive, and I never would have imagined the description of the situation that I received.

The explanation was partially puzzling: that the narrative during savasana helped the person to realize the transition from one side to the other across an expanse that was unknown, and unidentified. It's sort of like arriving at a destination, having missed part of the journey and not really sure why you're travelling in the first place. Even more strange is that I understood at an emotional level where it didn't make much sense from an intellectual level.

And we think we humans are smart...

The Longest Day

Wednesday ends up being the longest day of the week, today beginning with an early start at the office and finishing after piano. I recognized the need to break around 5, and got to Yoga early. There, I had the opportunity to do a little early relaxing, breathing, and a couple of simple postures.

The class was packed, but we still had room to work. I was happy to hear from someone behind me that my form was good, my movements smooth and that I was a model for him (since he couldn't see the teacher).

Piano is coming along. (Practice makes such a big difference come lesson time.) Learning more of the new Ravel piece and communicating well with my teacher. It's the end of a long day for both of us, but it ended up well today.

Practice What We Preach

I did a run today on channeling the feelings in the forum where the outcome can be affected. The feelings were brought forth honestly and were received and understood. The true test, however, is the desired outcome. My concern is that without a chronic and persistent chase that the status quo remains. There is a point in time where the target outcome must change in order to realize the intent.

My outward appearance brought at least one to the conclusion that I'd had a rough time today. While part of the negotiating was a little trying, I think the big drain was continuous effort with no time for assimilation. There is significance to the intermediate stops along the daily journey. The absence of these stops seems to compound the toil. So, take breaks.

Next step is to investigate the other opportunities available. It takes time to nurture and grow opportunities, or so it seems.

Monday

Work went mostly according to schedule today with my personal productivity at a high level. With few exceptions, my day went according to plan and I accomplished what I set out to do.

Yoga class was fabulous with the teacher coming to class fresh out of continuing/expanded ed. It was great to be the beneficiary of her renewed enthusiasm and updated knowledge.

I did some PD at home tonight for a computer problem that was accompanied by high emotion. It took about an hour to debug and, as expected, the problem was configuration settings. It just took the time to find out how the system worked and which settings needed to be modified. I'm glad the problem worked out and that relief accompanied the solution.

In the middle of this, I got a half hour of piano in and haven't studied French yet. Still time tonight to carry on.

Sunday in Columbus

As I wathched the morning emerge outside the windows of my mother's home, I remembered that each day offers a fresh start -- a clean sheet of paper; a blank canvas. If by choice we allow it, an infinite number of new possibilites are open to us for an equal number of new experiences. We can continue to work on projects in flight, such as our physical well-being. We can take the time to consider something totally new -- either that that comes to us instantaneously, or that we seek with open eyes.

If the day is a marathon and not a sprint, who do we preserve the freshness of morning through the day? One idea is the restorative periods of assimilation that we should allow for. A little downhill stroll after a long climb gives us the recharge cycle needed.

Timing

There is always that time in the middle of the night, or first thing in the morning, or some moment during our waking hours where that rush of frustration, panic, anger, anxiety or other sensation emerges. While these feelings are largely coupled to emotions and while emotions don't necessarily contribute to solving a problem or changing a situation, the feelings definitely creep into the foreground of our thoughts. For troubling situations, the recurring presence of these nagging thoughts gets in the way of our agenda.

So often we're told to control our feelings, or keep them to ourselves. There is the idea that letting out your feelings shows you as weak, or out of control. While that may well be true -- especially if the behavior driven by your feelings is inappropriate at the time you're driven by your feelings.

However, there is probably a good time to release and share the feelings. Is it possible that sharing the feelings in an appropriate setting -- such as working with a colleague with whom you're, say, frustrated? If feelings and emotions are part and parcel of the human being and experience, then the exchange of feelings along with the exchange of ideas needed to relieve the anger, frustration, etc. may be a very positive step toward making the changes needed for personal relief.

As an example, if I go day to day without expressing to a co-worker a situation that I would like to see changed and I continue to see no change, shouldn't I emphasize the need for change by sharing the feeling? At a minimum, isn't it better to share the feeling with the agents needed to make the change?

Maybe the best thought on this subject is that one shouldn't experience the negative impact alone. Maybe it's better to save the feelings until the time when they can be shared with the change agents -- postpone the midnight rush of anxiety until you can be with the group needed to change the situation? Probably, yes. I'm sure I'd be the hero to many if I had the recipe for turning off anxiety immediately, knowing that there is a better time to experience it. What may be most critical is to control the behavior -- which could be inappropriate -- and to channel the emotion, which could be a contribution to changing things as desired.

First Week of 2006

Much of this week involved work. And, then there was work. Yet nestled between work sessions were Yoga, personal training, piano lesson and practice, study of French, discussions with people close to me and other fun stuff. Business results were better than planned, better than expected so that is good. So the best play for work is to lead the team to the next level, be more efficient and effective overall, and get smarter than others in the same business.

We're going to do the rain date for my Mom's birthday and Christmas this weekend. Even though this means saddle time in the car for many hours, it will be good to share the time with my family. This year has many other interesting events and as we proceed the activity density will increase -- college tours, app, acceptance and decision; seminars and travel; places I may go, etc.

The combination of opportunities and blessings is humbling, and leaves me compelled to make the most out of all things I do.

Self-worth

It's a difficult challenge to get through life if we define our sense of self-worth by those around us. Sure, a teacher can give us a grade, a boss can give us a raise, a parent can tell us we did well. But, there is a point in time where we have to decide for ourselves how we want to feel about ourselves.

If we wait for someone else to tell us how well we did, we may be waiting a really long time. If we need that encouragement from others -- which we all do from time to time -- we should find the environment that is supportive and positive. Should we need to express feelings to others that indicate we don't feel good about ourselves, we should first and foremost be honest about our feelings, but we should also realize that we don't have to accept feelings other than those we want to accept.

In creating an environment for growth, it's important that everyone has an opportunity to contribute, grow and learn. There's value in learning how to play the different positions even though you want the best players in their strongest positions at game time. Having the strong only do what they always have done doesn't lead to growth. At some point, the apex is reached. In a learning environment, the goal is growth.

Tapped?

At the end of Wednesday, after full work, Yoga, Piano, and stuff I'm finding myself a wee bit tapped out. With the tiredness comes a little feeling of anxiety, or impatience. I noticed it first in Yoga where it seemed just a little cramped tonight and hands and feet "encroaching" my space, in my face. I think that might bug me even if I wasn't weary. Or, was the anxiety prompted by the latte just before Yoga? Leaning toward the lack of personal space.

Two more days of work this week, with fun stuff to do. Travelling to see Mom this weekend and see how she's doing. Need to find some rest along the way. Don't forget the feeling of calm and relaxation gained after vacation and a few days off. Just remember that space and return to it :)

My First Blog

Today is a great day to stay in the moment. With all the many activities there are to do, thinking about them all at once will jam up the brain and create tension and anxiety. Breathe through any points of mental congestion. Take the time between tasks to assimilate what was learned and take note of what must be remembered.

Enjoy the interactions and make each one special as each interaction is unique.

No, I'm not writing a heady, new-age advice column -- but I probably could!

Good Day

It was a good day to get back to work. While I'd been keeping up with my e-mail while on vacation and saved the things that needed my attention when I got back, I realized that there is much more to work than just doing e-mail. I found a full and rich set of activities waiting for me to engage in and did so refreshed and revitalized.

Training was great tonight and there were lots of new, interesting and challenging exercises to learn and enjoy.

Back to Work

The new year begins for work. It's the year to be more efficient and focus more on use of time. It will be a good year -- a great year. Business will grow because of people and planning.

Last Day of Vacation

I have very much enjoyed my vacation. The good news is that I've kept up with my work for the most part and won't have to pour through piles of e-mail. January will be a busy month at work, so it is important to plan and to pace.

Today is rainy and cool outside (50) and a nice day to remain inside, study French, practice piano, and tidy up here and there. I caught up on some bookkeeping, but am not quite current. In addition to my normal things, I would like to add an organized home office to the mix of desired outcomes. I'm at the point where I start making tradeoffs of my time at home. I think the best approach is to always leave the room just a little better than when you entered it. At some point, there's nothing left to do. (Not a bad idea for a habit in general -- leave it just a little better than you found it!)

I went to Yoga today and the regular teacher was a no-show. Marie F. showed up as a student, but just so happened to be qualified to teach and under agreement with the center. She did an outstanding job, and it was really great to see someone rally.

I'll see SR at cyco tonight, but plan to use up the cyco passes. Triangle is a better center, is closer, has a more interesting selection of classes, and so on. However, there are great people at cyco and I've learned a lot there and advanced my skill.

Happy New Year

My First Blog
We're back from Paris, but still waking up at four in the morning. It's kind of cool to wake up early and watch movies, or Daily Show recordings. Yet in a couple of days I'll need to wake up earlier to avoid the irresistable urge to go to sleep by ten at night.

I got to do some great Yoga over the past two days and found the first of two sessions a little more challenging. I also did my floor workout today and found that went smoothly.

When asked about my NY resolution, I quickly replied that I'll continue to work on my French, my physical well-being, piano, my career and my family. That means I'm not really taking on any new ventures this year. As much as anything, I want to be more efficient as well as more effective. That really translates to organizing and using time wisely.